Today I chose to extend my otherwise rushed lunch break to sit on our verandah and soak in the welcoming August sun. It was a picture perfect day, the first for a long while.
As I turned to face the inviting rays, I closed my eyes and realised how much I missed the comforting warmth. It felt sublime, and in an instant melted my worrying thoughts into a trance-like stillness. I could have stayed put for hours immersed in what seemed like impenetrable peace.
I've been quietly struggling of late, attempting in disbelief to decipher what on earth is happening to our precious world. It feels so broken, so sombre and surreal. Covid-19 is all-consuming in every direction I turn and I'm constantly attuned to the undeniable heaviness spread across the global board.
The impact corona fear saturates our lives with is heartbreaking, nevertheless I realise how fortunate we continue to be in our beautiful corner of the world. As long as we each keep complying with mandatory restrictions and measures, we will hopefully be spared of clustering or hot-spotting our endearing country paradise.
While I've mindfully concentrated on making the best of my restricted lifestyle, some days I have failed miserably. The abnormality of the situation at times has worn thin and occasionally my thoughts ventured around people, places, events, even climates I miss terribly.
I'm annoyed when I let this happen. Not only does this reflection and longing make me unhappily drag my behind, but I start yearning for a life put on hold. These particular thoughts aren't the slightest bit helpful or supportive of my mental health and have the power to pull me down, immobilising me in a flash.
My life isn't on hold at all and nor would I ever want it to be. Time passes way too quickly regardless of circumstances, and god knows, I'm no spring chicken anymore! I just need to think creatively outside of the square.
Therefore, I decided I do not wish to look back on 2020 and predominantly recall it as the year of an unprecedented, wretched virus. I will remember this significant start to the new decade as the time frame I finally bit the bullet and created significant, long overdue changes to my lifestyle. More so, letting go of undesirable habits and replacing them with health-conscious routines, which I am now successfully battling. It hurts - badly - but the rewards will taste all the more delicious.
Yes, 2020 will be remembered as the year I generated profound, wholistic alterations to my life. I have let go of detrimental patterns, even people to some extent. I am in the process of decluttering and spring cleaning myself and my immediate environment. Perfect, therapeutic activities during isolation.
I am teaching myself a foreign language and I'm allowing more time for my two great loves of reading and writing - without paying attention to the niggling whisper of, "Shouldn't you be working? There is so much to do!"
However, as much as these changes are positive with promised, constructive results, they don't feel meaningful enough to satisfy my contentment hunger. It's too much of 'all about me'.
Once I recognised this missing link, I researched my options of how I could reach out to others less fortunate than I struggling during this difficult corona induced period. I didn't have to look very far! Supporting and offering altruistic assistance gives me joy among the doom and gloom and presents a valid purpose. Now knowing I am making a difference to others, allows me to breathe freely while fully enjoying precious 'me time'.
Making the most of these corona conditions is important to me. I don't wish to waste a single moment and I will not let these unpleasant circumstances overpower me! I will use this time wisely, while quietly hoping for and looking forward to better times sooner rather than later.
This covid-19 pandemic is temporary and since February I've continually assured myself each morning upon waking, "We're another day closer to a new norm." Yet this statement too is wearing thin, as we're just not close enough for my liking. Surely we, the habitants of this globe, have all learnt our lessons by now?! Isn't it time to restart our world minus the devastating virus intruder? I wish it were so.
In the meantime, join me in finding your creative and productive outlets. Discover and act on positivity to camouflage this disruptive year. I honestly thought 2020 was going to be brilliant, as it had such a wonderful ring to it. Never in my wildest dreams did I see covid-19 coming ... but we are stronger. Please remember that always.
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