Just Can't Get My Head Around It Presently....

It seems I'm off balance this week, leaning more toward my physicality in an attempt to make sense of what's been happening in and around my world. I'm really struggling with spiritual concepts, which is why I call myself the 'stumbling spiritualist'. I'm having a stumbling (or more like a falling over) phase presently, leaving me with a heavy heart.

Everywhere I turn, people are having to deal with so much trauma, grief and confusion. Some are having to fight their way through multiple tragic episodes at one time. How are they managing to stay afloat? Some remain in shock, struggling to digest what has occurred in a blink of an eye, and hoping there's not more of the same to come in the near future.

These people I refer to are my loved ones, and I am standing beside them feeling completely powerless. It's not a pleasant experience, in fact, it breaks my heart. These souls are beautiful, warm, compassionate and selfless and don't deserve any of the devastation they are experiencing.

Why do such good people have so much to bear? Why is it some peoples' journeys are filled with complication and trauma, again and again? Can't the load be shared? Can't they have a break to pick themselves up and shake themselves off before the next hurricane hits them?

Yes, apparently we plan our physical life before we slip into our chosen bodies (Often I wonder, ' What were we thinking?'!).

Yes, apparently we are not dished out more than what we can handle – ever (Really?!).

Yes, there's a reason/purpose for everything. Life is like a game of dominoes, all exactly fitting into place (Wish we were allowed in on the reason from our stance too. Would make life a whole lot easier!).

Yes, we need to let go of what we can't control, meaning I need to let go of my sadness, as they're not my challenges, so to speak (But if loved ones hurt, I hurt).

Yes, a bubble of white light, or the like, is good to place yourself in so your sensitivity is spared from emotions that aren't yours (That often doesn't work for me either, if I am close to the troubled person).

There are many more spiritual truths, that just aren't doing it for me at the moment. I just can't get my head around them! It's so difficult watching people in pain and not being able to assist them – except to be there for them. Yes I know, being there for them is a wonderful thing, however I wish I could share their load, or I wish events that have happened, didn't. I wish I could ease their pain, but no matter what I do or how much I try, I am unable…...and that makes me very sad….